Slump

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Slump

You say the words you've coached for nights. Dropping from your mouth like a hammer, beating the final nail of this cherished relationship's coffin solidly in. Her brown curls frame her face, wisps brushed from her face as she stares in disbelief. Mouth quivering, her eyes shine with an oncoming mist. Rushed sentences fly from her lips as you stand there, taking it all in.

Your own mouth twitching at the pain you're causing, a deep breath, and then you say it again. Taking a step back you look her one last time. This will be the last time she looks at you like that, with love, with hope. From now on, you can expect only whatyou see bubbling onto her features: disbelief, sorrow, anger, hate. Turning, your hand opens the door and you duck out.

Her words stop and you hear her knees crash to the floor. The dull thud of a crumpled frame. Leaning against the doorframe, your eyes closed, the tears break from the dam you tried to hold. A rattled inhale matches your own from the other side, a whimpered breath follows.

With nothing in your mind you push away from the door, away from the girl you're leaving behind, away from your own feelings. The roar of the engine as you start your car can't deafen the sound of her slumping to the floor in your ears. Echoing and repeating over and over in your head. Focus. You have to drive. Punching the radio, the CD in your car yells it's voice higher than your own as you yell. Pushing emotions out of you with each kick of the bass.

The phone in your pocket vibrates but you can't answer it. There's no going back, there's nothing to take anymore. You wonder, have you made the right decision? Telling yourself it wouldn't have worked out, the futile nature of it all just wasn't meant to be. Own words empty, the driving consumes you as you focus on the road. Making your way back home, to the family that you'll put on the mask for. They'll never know what you've done or had to do in these final moments. Burned into your heart and your head, the sound of a girl falling to the floor on account of what you said.

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